In Honor of Cleaning Out Your Closet
By Carlo Dall’Olmo

I was contemplating my story the other day after having gone through a reading of it, trying to figure out how to do the next rewrite. I say “contemplating” because really what I was doing was surfing the net. I consider surfing the net part of “writing” because I can think about my story as I engage in absolutely nothing productive and still call it writing. I’m researching.

I got onto Facebook and started down that rabbit hole when I came across a message alerting me to “friends” I have the least interaction with. I started reviewing the list. It was quite extensive to say it mildly. I have over 1200 “friends” of which I know maybe a handful. When I started out on fb, I was connecting with anyone I could – like being back in high school, the more ‘friends” you had the more popular you seemed to everyone around you. You are loved and validated by the fb friends.  As I was going through the friends list, I decided to really examine the list and see if being connected to these people really moved my life forward or were they just a space filler adding nothing more to my life. 

Some were easy to cut others not so easy. Some I knew right away weren’t doing anything for me. They were space fillers on my page. Some never did anything on fb – they were easy to get rid of but then after a while I started getting to more complex connections – you know, the ones maybe you were friends with early in life, you reconnected through fb hoping to rekindle the friendship and only to find that time has basically made you strangers. One friend in particular was a college buddy. A great guy, everyone loved him – life of the party.  After college we fell out of touch but then reconnected on fb many years later. We caught up, chatted a couple of times. Birthdays would come and go – I would wish him a happy one but never anything on his end. He would post occasionally, and I would respond but never a return reply when I would post. I found myself getting a bit irritated and at first let it go – thinking, ‘well that is how he is’ – some people just aren’t active on fb. I made excuses and kept the delusional belief going. 

This went on for a few years. My connection with him was not his connection with me. Then one day, it all came into focus with that one simple fb notice “least interaction.” It got me thinking – if this “friend” wasn’t on my list, would my life be any worse because of it? Would I lose something profound? Or would I finally realize that my connections should be special and move my life forward?

As this great revelation tapped me on the shoulder and slapped me in the face, I had another revelation as I came to which helped put my story in perspective. I’ve been told ad nauseum by various instructors that if the scene doesn’t move your story forward then cut it. Get rid of it – you don’t need it.  That real estate is precious – don’t waste it. It didn’t really make sense to me as it related to my stories – after all, don’t all scenes move your story forward? You go from the bar (in one scene) to a moving car (in another scene) – isn’t that moving your story forward? It wasn’t until my “least interacted” notice grabbed my attention that I suddenly understood what that really meant. Unless the scene enriches your story – unless you learn something new, learn more about the character…the scene should not be in your story – cut it. Much like my old friend who didn’t really do anything to move my life in any meaningful way, you shouldn’t waste valuable real estate holding on to the scene.

Surfing fb is usually a big time killer and something I try hard not to do. There are occasions, though, much like a broken clock being correct a couple times a day, where spending time on the fb can accidently be productive. So, here’s to you fb! Here’s to unproductive time and accidental strokes of genius. Most of all, here’s to helping me understand what I need to do for my next rewrite.

If you have a thought on this article, I would love to hear it. Please drop me a line in the comments below